I’m barely hanging on today. It sucks to admit that. I can always tell when I’ve reached my limit when it comes to stress. The first sign is my vocab. I start to cuss. If you don’t ever feel stressed AND you never swear, please just stop reading this now.
Category: Seeking God (page 1 of 3)
Dependency. I’ve always struggled in that area. It’s the whole idea of not NEEDing help because I can do it myself. As a child, I could tie my shoes, pick out my own clothes (didn’t care if they didn’t match). I could color and cut and paste my own projects. I could even brush my own hair (although I rarely ever did). I didn’t want or need anyone else’s help. Some of it was because of my stubbornness. Mostly, I just wanted to be able to do all the things.
Last month, I went to New Life Center on a Sunday morning and listened to a message about faithfulness given by my son-in-law. He asked, “Are you looking for a King or for comfort?” Before the message, we sang a song called King of My Heart. The lyrics talk about God being good. I truly believe that he is good but then when it came to the next line, it gave my faith a good shake.
Stand Firm. That’s become my mantra this year. It started around springtime when I was reading my bible and came across these words highlighted in blue. It said: “If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.” Julianne, stand firm. God continues to tell me this. Okay, I say. I’m doing it. I’m standing firm. By the way, what do you mean? Stand firm? Stand Firm.
One morning at YoungLives Camp, I made my way over to the Orchard Inn. It was where I led a small team of nannies who would help care for eleven adorable and very busy toddlers. I wanted to make sure our group was fully prepared so instead of walking, I began to run. Something in my spirit told me there was no need to run. I sat on a nearby bench to pray.
Yesterday I wrote about how I used to be a runner. Today, in church, I learned I am still a runner. That is, figuratively speaking. As humans, we are always running, either toward or away from something. I like to think I’m running toward God’s plan for my life and not away from it, but it’s not always true.
I used to be a runner. Back in December of 2009, I ran my first training mile. If I remember correctly, it was a bone-chilling 22 degrees and it took me 17 minutes. I was inspired by the TV show Biggest Loser and decided the night before I wanted to run a full marathon. Twelve months later on November 27th, I did just that. I ran 26.2 miles with a 12-minute pace.